I don't want you to think I am suggesting that we can just decide to accept ourselves as an intellectual construct and that we will then be able to experience that indefinitely.
I don't want to pretend it's as simple as deciding or choosing. If we simply could choose to do so, we would have already, unwaveringly.
Our complexity lies in our indecisiveness. In one moment we think yes I do. Yes I can be on my own side. And in the next moment it's an impossibility.
We want to, we want to be happy. But we are mired with fear.
We are confused by our own complexity. We are believing so many things from one moment to the next and sometimes simultaneously we believe conflicting things.
We are so deeply influenced by others telling us- yes we are worthy one minute and no we are not the next. We cannot separate our own opinions from others.
So I am not saying it is easy, or as simple as choosing. But I do believe it is necessary. We cannot flourish otherwise. We cannot use our pain and turn it into growth.
What I am suggesting is that you love your pain. Love your anxiety. Love your loneliness. Love your melancholy. Your unmet desires. Your anguish.
To love is to be patient, to be kind, to give space, and to hold with care.
Do not resist these things. Do not push them away, do not avoid them. Instead, attend to them with a welcoming nature. With an open palm.
And they will transform with your love. You will transform with your love. We must love ourselves into changing. Rather than berating or shaming ourselves to.
It is not easy, it will require our remembrance in each moment- because we will forget and go into our old habits.
So it will feel like work at first- until it isn't anymore. Until we have to remind ourselves less. And then it simply is a thing that exists in us, wavering less.
Then we will know these things called integrity, dignity, patience, kindness and tenderness. And we will extend these lovely things that we have grown inside of ourselves to those who we come into contact with. And they will be inspired by our treasures. The treasure chest of strength we have grown inside of ourselves.
Go on then...soften- moment to moment to that sweet thing of loving thyself. Don't wait for other people to do it for you. For they cannot sustain it for you. We can barely sustain it for ourselves.
But the one thing we can do is remember to extend care to ourselves in our difficult moments- to be loving then- when it is the most difficult to love ourselves. When you question your worth, your abilities, your beauty, your intelligence, your strength.
Go on then...
These words were birthed after this pensive picture was taken at the Père Lachaise Cemetery in Paris.
Hailing from a suburb of Toronto, I moved to the West Coast of Canada in 2004 to study Environmental Science in Victoria, BC. Always passionate about the health of Mother Earth and the health of those who occupied it. I studied yoga in India in 2007 returned to Vancouver in 2008. I taught yoga and worked at one of Vancouver's leading Naturopathic Clinics as a Clinical Associate. I continued to study yoga with some fantastic and respected North American teachers and returned to India for more studies in 2011. Now, I live in Paris, France and teach both group classes and privately. My aim is to bring about improved well-being, in whatever form is required.